I like to paaaaaaaaarty

I have never submitted to the worlds of Internet, speed or blind dating and I never will. I freely admit that unvarnished prejudice is one of the reasons - even though some of my most charming and attractive friends have done it and enjoyed it I know I would find the whole experience excruciating and belittling. No offence and good luck to those of you who feel otherwise.

I nearly made an exception once. In 1998 I went to stay with my buddy Leigh in Canada and the two of us and our friend Andrew wrote a lonely hearts ad for me for a laugh. I don't think they placed it (certainly I never heard from anyone ...), but we spent some time deliberating over what to put in it. The hardest decision was how to address the subject of my having a good sense of humour.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and assert that I'm a very funny guy. I have too much respect for you, Dear Reader, to pretend that I don't believe that to be the case. I'm told, and I am finally beginning to believe, that this is a quality people like in a potential boyfriend and thus I wanted to stress it in my ad. However, nigh-on every man had written "GSOH" in their own ad - so how to stand out from the crowd?

I can't remember how we resolved the conundrum because I never had any intention of going through with the project because I was crippled by shyness at that point in my life.

I'm reminded of this episode because I have been reflecting on a night out I enjoyed yesterday. It was spectacularly good fun, and prompted me to realise that when I fill in the Other Interests section of my CV, I really should put "socialising". I'm not sure there is anything I enjoy more than being in the company of friends and interesting new people and I'm not sure that there should be. (I am including family in the friends bracket here, by the way.)

But just as I didn't want to write an anaemic lonely heart ad, so informing potential employers that I like to paaaaaaaaarty would hardly do me justice.* It's probably better to say that I fit well into an office environment and that I am an affable colleague, or something wet like that.

Let me instead share with those of you who are perceptive, thoughtful, intelligent, kind and fabulous enough to read this blog that I am at my most carefree and happy when surrounded by old friends and making new ones (preferably on the same night) and doing little else other than drinking, eating and dancing.

And yes, people like it when you make them laugh.

*Although if I am ever looking to hire someone and a CV is passed to me in which the applicant intones "I like to paaaaaaaaarty" then they will get the job on the spot.

P.S. Someone among you is reading this and thinking "Well I don't find you funny". One day, Sir, we will meet and I will make the girl of your dreams cry with laughter - RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU.